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Trudi Daniels (@TrudiDan) & Marc Fellhauer (@MarcFell) are here today! Jeffrey Epstein’s weird art, Kwame’s kid appeals to Trump, Big Magic Johnson doesn’t understand lists, Jay Z+NFL=angry people, Ozzy Osbourne’s magic gene, Don Lemon’s bar trick, still in search of Monkeemobile Mel and BranDon needs to see a gastroenterologist. The oral history of the Woodward Dream Cruise sounds like as much of a snooze-fest as driving old cars up & down the same road over & over again. It’s day 3 of attempting to reestablish our connection with Monkeemobile Mel & this time we’re talking to his acquaintance Dave to see if we can rekindle the spark. Video has surfaced of Andy Dick getting sucker punched outside of One Eyed Jacks in the French Quarter. Bam Margera got arrested after lying and throwing a fit in the lobby of the Luxe hotel shortly after ditching rehab days earlier. Turns out the reason Ozzy can snort ants, eat bats & rail any drug out there without getting so much as a cold is because of his ‘mutant’ DNA. For his 60th birthday, Big Magic Johnson released a couple ‘lists’ of his top 60 favorite things. The only problem is they are in no order defeating the point of a list. CNN’s Spokesperson is pretty busy this week: Chris Cuomo equating ‘Fredo’ to the ‘N’ word & freaked out on a guy. And Don Lemon has been accused of stuffing his hand down his own pants & then sticking the his stink fingers in the accuser’s mustache. Todd Chrisley, the most effeminate straight man with the intensely frosted tips, has been indicted on charges of tax evasion. The latest update in the Jeffrey Epstein case is that an oil painting of President Clinton in a blue dress & matching heels was found hanging in Epstein’s mansion. Jizzlaine Maxwell has been located living her best life with her much younger boyfriend in their $3M Massachusetts mansion. Breaking News: Scott Borgerson denies that he’s dating Jizzlaine, but would like you to know that he used to be in the Coast Guard & started a pet therapy program. 4chan broke the news about Jeffrey Epstein’s death a full Jackson before the traditional media covered the story. Tom Mesereau, who got Michael Jackson & Robert Blake off, is now exploring the possibility of getting R. Kelly out of trouble. Bill Gates managed to snag another headline sans Melinda, but it’s about another one of his meetings with Jeffrey Epstein. One of Kwame Kilpatrick’s ‘big headed boys’ made a video plea to President Trump asking him to hook his dad up with a pardon. Breaking News: A shooting in Philadelphia has left at least 5 officers shot. Trudi is concerned that with all the exercise Maggs & Layla have been doing lately, that they could possibly take up swimming & fall victim to the blue-green algae that is currently plaguing pets. The NFL’s solution to the Colin Kaepernick debacle was to hire Jay Z & Roc Nation to be the head of the league’s musical & activist arms. The Dayton shooter’s timeline on the day of the shooting has been released. Russia’s failed missile launch shouldn’t be much of an issue even if they get things sorted out because President Trump’s Space Force would be able to zap it out of the sky. In an effort to recoup costs for the failed event, Woodstock organizers are selling off pieces of the stage as collectible memorabilia. Dale Spalding from Canned Heat has a unique way of singing.